We all have our own notion of what our partners dream proposal might consist of; flowers, chocolates, champagne, romantic music, the cliché… but nobody stops to think about what happens when romance is not on your side. Here we have a list of the Top 10 Proposal Fails, fails so appalling you will think ‘What kind of person would be filled with such imbecility?’ but before you make that snap judgement, really think about the minute details that may seem small, but believe us, when executed incorrectly, the result could be catastrophic.
1. Forgetting to book the restaurant
Ring? Check. Suit? Check. Girlfriend? Check. Restaurant booking?…
If you’re reading this and laughing, ‘Who would seriously forget?’ You may laugh but we advise you wipe that smile off your face. Picture this scenario; it’s the most important night of your life and you have carefully thought out every little detail, such as spending time focusing on the beautiful ring and what you might say and how you might say it and how to give her the proposal of her life. You arrive at the restaurant, rush out of the car and open the door for her as she gracefully steps out, hand in hand. You walk through the front door of the restaurant, with confidence and speak to the Maitre’ D, ‘Hello, I have a reservation for two under the na… OH!’ Panic. Nightmare! You will look like a fool and your love will be angry at you for not being more organised. Whether it’s a Michelin Star restaurant or a Toby Carvery, restaurants run out of reservations. Book in advance!
2. Opening the box and the ring has done a Houdini
I don’t get it? Where’s the ring?!
‘How could this possibly happen?’ You ask. Perhaps you have previously been practicing with the ring or maybe you continuously look at the ring because you need to make sure that it is in fact the perfect ring. Have you taken the ring out to show your friends or maybe even her friends? Are you one of those messy beings that consistently misplace items or find the DVD in the wrong case? As absurd as it may sound, do not let that ring out of your sight!
3. Proposing when she is drunk
WOAHHH yeah sure I’ll marry youuuuuu
We understand your intentions are good and you have tried to make the proposal as romantic as possible by having a bottle of her favourite champagne ordered. One glass, two, three, another bottle… suddenly she is slurring her words and before you know it, she has dropped her fork on the floor. What a shambles! Whatever you do, do not go overboard. Some people say that being intoxicated actually makes the truth spill out but really, it just accentuates whatever you may be feeling that day and according to scientists, alcohol just makes you care less about how you behave. Do you really want a nonsensical potential fiancée sitting opposite you, slurring her words or perhaps ranting to you about something or other? The experience may be memorable for everyone else in the restaurant, but it needs to be memorable for her and she will not want to remember a splitting headache and a paracetamol-popping aftermath. Which takes us to another awful situation….
4. Proposing when YOU are drunk
Will YOU? Will you?… I forgot what I was going to say.
On the other hand, what is worse? To completely inebriate her, or yourself? They call alcohol the lubricant of society, the soother, the confidence boaster. Perhaps you have had a quick shot to calm yourself but suddenly, you don’t know how or why but you’re slurring your words. You have been so concentrated on being nonchalant and cool that now you’re just a babbling fool. I can assure you, she will see a person that does not take this seriously. On the off chance she finds the whole situation amusing, you may be off the hook, but we advise playing it safe. Make it memorable and romantic for both of you. Nobody finds hangover stories romantic.
5. Hiding the ring in a cake… or any kind of food. Gross
I ordered your favourite, darling. 1.00 carat cake!
Whether your love has a sweet tooth, a savory tooth, simply cannot resist delectable tasting food or you know she has a particular passion for dessert, unless instructed otherwise, do not conceal the ring in food. I can guarantee the mess you will be in will not be as sweet as an Eton Mess. Imagine it now, your love takes a bite of her tasty treat and ‘Ow!’ she has broken a tooth and even if that scenario does not arise, I know the woman will not want to place a messy ring on her finger. Trust us, we want the ring to sparkle and look absolutely pristine and she will not want a messy proposal.
6. Make sure it’s not YOUR dream proposal… it’s about HER
‘It was so good, I proposed at that Steakhouse I love’… ‘Oh? I thought she was a Vegetarian’
You may have racked your brain over and over again and have countless brilliant ideas of how to do the deed. But are they brilliant? Whether you would love to go to a Steakhouse, a football game, a desert island, propose in public or at a restaurant, this is about them. Think back to when you first met, where you have been on dates, what kind of things they like, what don’t they like. If you’re stuck for ideas, ask her friends or try to hint on the sly, but do not make it about yourself. Try to remember every time you made her smile, put all of those times into a jar and there you have your perfect proposal.
7. Dropping the ring
Will you… OH MY GOD, it’s on the floor, where did it go?!
Clumsiness is not attractive and neither is a missing ring. Although it may sound absurd, you could be the unlucky person it happens to. Did you know? One unfortunate man proposed to his girlfriend at the top of a roller-coaster and dropped the ring. Original or just plain stupid? She was most certainly shocked but unfortunately, filled with dismay, not elation. People have dropped the ring in the sea whilst proposing, in the snow whilst skiing, even whilst skydiving, making the stupid mistake of proposing whilst mid-way through a 12,500ft jump. With a camera to capture the entire drama of it all, about to ask the big question as the ring slipped from his grasp and plunged to earth. Whether the drop is big or small, take care, butterfingers!
8. Buying the ring on a joint bank account
Honey? Why is there an invoice of £2,000 from Robert Gatward Jewellers?
Uh oh. Busted. Not only is this careless, it’s unromantic and suddenly the element of surprise has disappeared. Perhaps auto-pilot kicked in and you pay for everything using this account, or perhaps you know the cost does not matter but forget the fact your partner often views the bank statements. Many couples have joint accounts and believe it or not, many couples like to split the cost of their ring. This does not necessarily mean that chivalry is dead but if you are paying using the joint account, make sure your partner knows beforehand.
9. Falling over whilst in the kneeling position
Will you be my… ow!
This may sound hilarious but please, do not make a fool of yourself. Okay so you’re not a gymnast but you can handle a simple manoeuvre, can’t you? Everything comes down to this final move; the dinner has gone well, she’s happy, I’m happy, what could go wrong? Suddenly you’re flat on your face and laughing hysterically just to calm your nerves. She might be laughing alongside with you or perhaps she is cringing with mortification and shame. Either way, as simple as it may seem, practice the big move before you take the big step.
10. Not buying the ring from Robert Gatward Jewellers
I cannot stop staring at my hand! I have never seen a diamond so perfect…
Is the bold exclamation your love will make when that ring is placed on her finger, providing of course the ring has been purchased from Robert Gatward Jewellers. ‘Of course you would be saying that’ is what you may be thinking but really, let us open your minds; every single one of our beautiful rings has been hand crafted right here in the UK, with a diamond that has been hand chosen by the owner himself. A diamond ring in a D colour with SI1 clarity, weighing 0.40ct and is certificated, costs £1,695 from Robert Gatward Jewellers. A ring with the same size diamond or smaller with a stone possessing quality that is not a patch on ours, cost more than 50% of the above price. How you ask? We are a family-run business, we take time and great detail choosing our diamonds and with us, you can expect perfection from the craftsman’s hands right to yours. Any ring you imagine, any diamond you desire, we can create the perfect piece for you.
There you have it, a list of what we consider the Top 10 Proposal Fails that really are just fails.
All of our engagement rings are unique, effortlessly elegant and have been hand made right here in the UK. We would love for you to browse our wonderful collection. If you require any more assistance and would like to speak to one of our engagement ring experts, please call us on 01235 603023 or alternatively, email us at firstname.lastname@example.org. Make sure you keep up to date with us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.